Fall Off an Epic V10 Sport (or surfski's for big guys)

I'm a big guy... ok, I'm a big fat guy. Seriously- I accept it. But, I wanted to try out a surf ski. Brian B, Cindy and Susan all look sooo cool in their 'go fast' boats. And, who doesn't want to try racing after reading Susan's race reports?! They're all fun in the sun (with the occasional cold weather, cold water, random falling in and woes of body pains).

So, I posted on Paddling.net about finding a "big guy" surf ski - something that will fit a wide load. A couple of options were thrown my way, one of which was an Epic V10 Sport. My first thought was of Brian - especially knowing that he's the coolest and most awesome Epic rep that I know. (And, I've met him when I stayed at his place for the Wilderness First Aid training.)

A bunch of e-mails and 3 weeks later, we scheduled time to get together. My main goal was to just sit in it, to see if my "body" would fit in the seat. At 19" wide, I didn't have high hopes. Because of it’s under stern rudder, we would have to do it in the water. Because we were going to be on the water anyway, we decided a short paddle was in order. We were going to get together on the Occoquan River at Fountainhead Park.

First, I would try out the surf ski; then, we would go for a paddle. Comically, Brian suggested I might be able to paddle the ski for the after-try out paddle. Ha. Haha. HAHA-HA.

Now seems as good of a time as any to tell you, dear reader, I have the balance of a drunken (insert something that has really poor balance). For me to think I'd be able to paddle a surf ski in the first place is hilarious in and of itself.

On Saturday, we got to the park where Brian started pulling boats down. Even with air temperatures of about 70, I started putting on my cold weather gear:

• heavy weight fleece/poly pants
• mid-weight poly long-sleeve shirt
• 3mm farmer john wet suit
• light poly t-shirt
• poly socks

I also had a pair of neoprene socks and neoprene gloves. Both of which got put on (the sandals I had were too big to fit the foot wells properly and I poked a hole in my palm on my first falling in).

Leading up to this, I had been telling my wife and daughter that I'd be trying out a racing kayak. My description of it was, "I'm going to fall in... A LOT." My 4 (almost 5) year old daughter summed it up best, "You're going to push off and fall in." Boy, was she right...

Brian gets the boat in the water, sits on the bow just in front of foot wells. I straddled the boat and gingerly set my fat ass down. Shockingly, I mostly fit. It was snugger than it should be and I'm pretty sure my upper body is wider than the rest of me. But, I could feel the bottom of the seat. Wow, shocker.

He then proceeds to strap my feet in while saying something about this helps with something or the other. I did hear something about, "You're shoes are going to make this challenging.". Then the velcro was on and he asked me the stupidest thing I've ever heard- "Are you ready?"

I was feebly sculling on my right-side. He said something about, these are more stable when you're paddling. So, I start a forward stroke and he lets go. SPLASH. I think, "Wow, that was quick." And then realize that my feet are stuck to the boat. Neato - so, I pull them out and in the process that removes one of my two shoes. I stand up (one shoed) and realize that I've punctured my hand on something under the water. AND- he's chuckling. (Incidentally, so is my wife who had the camera going for much of this.)

We take a moment. My wife goes for my neoprene socks. I start putting on my gloves. And Brian goes to put on his wet suit. He must have figured out that he'd be in the water much longer than he originally expected.

We setup for try #2. Same thing - he sits on the bow. I get my feet on the foot rest and under the S&M foot strap thingamajig. This time, he walks back to the stern (keeping contact with the boat at all times). He asks the stupid question again ("are you ready?"). I start to paddle forward and he then LIFTS the stern which dumps me into the water. Ok, he might not have lifted it - but, it sure looks that way in the pictures. And, how else can I explain why I barely got a 1/2 forward stroke before I fell over?

We setup for try #3. Most of the same - only this time, he suggests that I leave my feet dangling in the water. He let go and this time I did not fall in!! He hopped into the Epic 16 that he also brought and paddled up beside of me.

He asked a stupider (oh yeah, I said it- "stupider") question- "What do you want to do now?". As I'm thinking that I'm probably in water that's deeper than I can reach, I said that I think we should go back. At 20' long and not being able to use the rudder (feet dangling) - I did the world's largest U-Turn. As I was, I got thinking, "you know, I should really try to bring my feet in. I've got a tiny bit of momentum... now seems like a fantastic time for that."

Yeah, you guessed it- SPLASH. (That's #3 for 3, for those who are counting.)

I walked it back in.

After that, we swapped boats. I got into the Epic 16 and felt like a sardine. Even Brian said, "You sure don't look comfortable." But, paddling is paddling. I made sure he was ok and comfortable that I wouldn't hurt his boat. I wouldn't want to be like that for a long time, but we paddled for about an hour and a half. I'm sure he had to be incredibly frustrated at the painfully slow pace that I paddle at. But, he was nice and didn't let me know.

All in all- I liked it. I still think I'm too big for the V10 Sport. Hopefully I can drop some weight and try it again next spring.

[Map of put in and approximate paddling route]

[Full set of pictures]